Noel Four: Begrudgingly Merry in North London

Written by: Violet Myers

Christmas; A Christian celebration marking the anniversary of the birth of little known lord, saviour and general good guy Jesus Christ, occurs on the 25th of December. For one day only.

However, the grand old tradition of overeating, public drunkenness, polyester novelty jumpers and irresponsible spending is at least a two month long ordeal, that we must all endure in own manner. Ways of avoiding this tinsel covered death march into debt and week long indigestion are limited. Other than travelling to a largely Hindu country and kicking it with Ganesh for a couple of months, we fear that escape is futile and we might as well try to begrudgingly be merry this Christmas.

Luckily for us, North London have some Yule-tide treats to add a rosy glow to even the sourest scrooge.

Ice Skate at Alexander Palace, Muswell Hill
Unlike those limited edition ice rinks that spring up all over London as soon as it gets a bit chilly, Ally Pally’s rink is open year round. With professional coaching sessions, ice-bound pantos and club nights – Club de Fromage hosts a frozen cheese session (which we hear is a delicacy in France) on the 27th of November.
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Make Christmas Craft at Drink Shop & Do, King’s Cross
Lovely King’s Cross based cafe/bar Drink Shop & Do presents a day of Christmas craft. Materials are supplied and £9 gets you a whole day of fun and a Christmas cocktail – like you need an excuse you old drunks! 20th of December all day.
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Watch Rapunzel at Park Theatre, Finsbury Park
No need to bluff your way through that Pinter, or waste energy pretending you know what’s going on in ‘Waiting for Godot’, no one really does… Here’s a story line even you lot will understand!

Take the pressure off and enjoy something that will leave you feeling fluffy, with no past Hollyoaks cast members guaranteed!
3 Dec 2015 – 2 Jan 2016
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Have a Christmas sing-a-long at The Union Chapel, Islington
Prepare for plenty of static shocks – the energy and sparks from cheesy Yule-tide songs and cheap Christmas jumpers will be electric! Grab a partner and do the Rudolph, or relax with a mug of something mulled in one of London’s most beautiful venues.
17th December, Union Chapel is also open on Christmas day for a Christmas service
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Shop at Islington Christmas Market
Part of begrudgingly being merry at Christmas is begrudgingly buying gifts for people you see but once a year. Fortunately Islington market has you covered.

With some kitschy wonders to blow that Argos water-bottle cover out of the water, take that Uncle Barry!
4th – 20th December
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Get bendy for festive fitness, Yoga Flow, Finsbury Park
Before you entirely destroy the only body you’ll ever have with literal bucket loads of delicious trans fats, treat it to a special Christmas yoga session where all proceeds will go to charity. Ommmmm – my god that’s good karma!
20th December, 10.30 – 12pm
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Buy a tree at The Christmas Forest, Finsbury Park
Honour one of the Western World’s strangest traditions by hauling a tree into your front room, decorating it with bits of glass and slowly watching it die.
 Hunting for an extra special tree to fill your home with pine needles and your cat to use as a climbing post? Look no further than Finsbury Park’s Christmas Forest.
26th November until Christmas Eve, 8am-10pm
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Photographs by: Michael Barry

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