Broke January: Weird Ways to Make Money in 2016

Written by: Violet Myers

It’s been the season of gift giving, food buying and shot slamming. You may be reeling over your credit card bill, hearing echoes in your bank account and cursing ‘fun you’ who buys rounds for everyone in Wetherspoons. Why oh why are the drunk so generous?

You could be responsible, start saving and tighten your belt, but that just doesn’t sound like very much fun. Instead, why not get your kit off, become a human guinea pig or bare your soul to The Daily Mail.

Broke January weird ways to make money North London, Finsbury Park, Haringey, Islington, Hackney, magazine

Life Modelling

Let loose, get your tits out and shake what your mother gave you… actually I’m drawing that one, so keep very very still.

Booty Gained:
It’s booty for booty round these parts, a model can earn a whole lot of dough just for lounging around in the buff. Zamira, who worked on and off as a life model for two years got paid £3 per person attending the class, so averaged £20-30 for an hour. With classes up to two hours long, strip me down and paint me like one of your French girls.

Effort Necessary:
Though a lot of the work involves literally laying down, the challenge is staying completely still for hours at a time. It can be very painful and requires incredible concentration.

Pay day or Nah Mate:
Strangers see your bits, you’ll get a numb butt, but you may end up with a new found appreciation for your body and little bit of extra cash to line your pockets, once you’ve got your jeans back on.

Broke January weird ways to make money North London

“The Best part was after the class when the students would come and show me what they’d drawn. They were so complimentary, which was pretty super for my ego. I would definitely say it’s worth it!”

Life Modelling Photo: Ruff Root Creative

Sell Pants Online

One man’s trash is another man’s treasure, those stretched-out undies you go to the gym in: worth some serious pennies, you’re sitting in crusty smelly gold!

Booty Gained:
Mya, who sold her pants to make money for university shared some of the…grittier details:

“I sold mine for £25 per pair, but you can get more the dirtier they are. I used to buy multipacks from Primark for £3. I was selling them just before uni – so ‘barely 18’ was my niche…”

“…There are a lot of niches, pregnant goes for way more as they’re more specialist. People are really specific about the kind of pants they want, so cotton is quite popular… because of the absorption. It’s not just women, men sell them too, gym socks sell well.”

Broke January weird ways to make money North London, Finsbury Park, Haringey, Islington, Hackney, magazine

Effort Necessary:
Besides getting acquainted with the scariest Craig in the business (List not David) surely all the effort is down to your biology? “Someone got a hold of email address and found me on Facebook and tried to blackmail me, saying he was going to tell my family and wanting to get free pairs of pants, it was really scary, but I ignored and he eventually stopped.”

So If you do fancy giving it a go remember to protect your privacy and be careful who your personal details are visible to.

Pay day or Nah Mate…:
Perhaps it’s a little creepy if you think about it too much. 
But what’s the world without a little kink? Your clients get an exciting regular package through the post and you get some extra fivers to throw at strippers.

‘Bloomers’ photo: Heather from Canada
‘Knickers’ photo: Sarah

Broke January weird ways to make money North London, Finsbury Park, Haringey, Islington, Hackney, magazine

Sell a Story

You know those mad people in magazines claiming to have had a month long affair with the ghost of Jeremy Beadle or after much disturbing research have discovered they are their own grandpa? Well tabloids, gossip magazines and other ‘less respectable’ publications pay top dollar for these stories, you could be one of those weirdos!

Booty Gained:
While the average confession may get you a not-to-be-sniffed at £100, a really juicy story can land you up to £1000.

“If anyone thought it was weird I’d just remind them that it paid my rent for the month!”

Explains one girl, who wishes to remain anonymous. She sold a particularly nutty story to a widely read paper and reaped the financial benefits, with minimum effort required other than a quick interview and the use of some colourful adjectives.

Broke January weird ways to make money North London, Finsbury Park, Haringey, Islington, Hackney, magazine

Effort Necessary:
“I found the ad on Facebook, sent them a message and had a telephone interview. They sent a stylist to my house took some photos and that was it.”

A few hours of posing and asking questions and you’ve got your mug in a mag and money in the bank, ding ding ding!

Pay Day or Nah Mate:
Is it worth it? Don’t you receive worried phone calls from your Mum? Suffer through a shit storm of trolls? Our anonymous friend reassures us that this isn’t necessarily the case, it can, in fact, lead to the added bonus of pints being bought for you down the pub (potentially):

“Nobody I didn’t want to noticed it because people don’t expect to see someone they know in the paper. My friends all thought it was hilarious and called me a legend for doing it.”

Broke January weird ways to make money North London, Finsbury Park, Haringey, Islington, Hackney, magazine

Take Part in Medical Research

It sounds like the start of a really bad B movie; poor Londoner enters a research facility in order to make a quick quid, leaves with five new nipples and a Safeway advantage card. But many of these programmes are popping up all over the city, offering an early pay day for a week of bed rest, day time TV and hourly injections.

Booty Gained:
Martin, who took part in a trial in 2015, received £1000 for a two night stay at Hammersmith Medicines Research.

“It was weirdly easy money. The drug I was testing had zero side effects and I spent most of the time watching ‘Don’t Tell the Bride’ with the other people on the trial.”

Other trials have been known to pay up to £3000 but drugs may have more side effects and stays may be up to a month at a time.

Broke January weird ways to make money North London, Finsbury Park, Haringey, Islington, Hackney, magazine

Effort Necessary:
Unfortunately sitting about getting acquainted with BBC Three isn’t the be all and end all of medical research, each trial requires frequent blood samples and strict rules.

“The blood tests were every two hours and at times pretty painful. Also between waking up and taking the drugs we weren’t allowed to eat, drink water or get out of bed, which makes you feel a bit of a medical prisoner.”

Pay Day or Nah Mate:
Besides feeling like some sort of bloated blood cow, surely the 1000 smackers softens the blow?

“Obviously the money was great, I’d have never have made that much in such a short amount of time. But the whole process was weird, painful and ultimately mind numbingly boring.”

Article header / Top Photo (IOU): Images Money

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