North London Life Hacks For The Savvy
Written by: Sophie Taylor
The internet loves a good life hack article, doesn’t it just. But what about us shrewd North Londoners? We know it all already, right? Well here are a few North London focused tips that you might not have heard about yet (but most likely have, so enjoy the gifs we’ve carefully chosen for you instead. Gif Curators… I wonder if that’s a thing). Yes, that’s right we’ve gone and done an article with life hacks, a list and gifs in it. You can write strongly worded letters of complaint to us at firstname.lastname@example.org.
1. Drunken Olympics
Do you like sports? Do you like beer? Oh good. Do you also like free things? Download MatchPint app and get a free pint (568 millilitres of beer to be precise). In return, you must watch some sports at one of their participating pubs, which can be found across North London, and give them a little rating/review. This also includes watching the Olympics by the way. Too easy!
2. AA for Cyclists
Bike woes? Can’t make it to your trusty bike shop for a repair? Save your legs and your pennies and use North London based, Bikes R Us mobile repair service. They offer a complete cycle repair service either at your home or place of work. There’s no local callout charge and callouts are available up to approximately 15 miles (excluding Central London).
A full annual service costs from £25, the supply and fit of a new inner tube (puncture) will set you back £12 and wheel trueing is just £6-10 good English pounds.
They don’t have a website or an app, so go old skool and keep 020 8882 8288 saved in your phone under ‘BIKE HELP NOW!’, right next to ‘STRANGE BLOKE FROM BAR’ and ‘???’. Apparently when you ring them you have to speak to their mum first and ask if they’re in…
3. Satnav No Go
Are you one of those rare species of Londoners that drives? Well if you are, here’s a little word of advice – don’t use satnav if you want to avoid congestion charges. Apparently, that little fucker of a satnav will take you into all these pricey congestion charge zones on purpose, the naughty little snake!
4. No Place Like Home
Lost your phone, your compass and your dignity? Somehow wandered into South London and need to get home quick sharp? The flat side of the ‘Walkie-Talkie’ (20 Fenchurch Street) points towards north London like a beautiful silvery lighthouse. No need for those ruby slippers, which is just as well as you left them outside the club, didn’t you.
5. Silence of the foxes
Foxes are fantastic creatures. They’re also loud as arse when you’re trying to get some shut-eye. So here’s a tip if you’re being plagued by those screaming urban red heads: they hate chilli powder. Liberally dust some spice around your back garden, front garden, foot of your bed (can’t be too careful- according to the Daily Mail they’re after your face as you sleep). Peace at last.
6. Peace in Angel
I spend a weird amount of time in Angel, but even I didn’t know about the footpath off Duncan Street that leads down to the canals. The traffic noise suddenly disappears, the tourists are lost in the shopping centre and all you are left with is narrowboats, casual cyclists, and water. City stress heads in need of an urban refuge take note – this is one calm oasis in the middle of one of North London’s most frantic of spots.
7. Station to Station
Citymapper is a great route planning app, but as a savvy North Londoner you’re probably after something a little more extensive and in the know. Try the Station Master App, which is more of an in-depth travel guide app than a route planner, giving you intensely detailed information about each station – from the number of steps to fun facts and historical background info.
It also doesn’t require WiFi so you can browse at your heart’s content underground. Station Master has 3D maps and exit maps so you can see the true layout of a station, especially the ones with a maze of corridors, and find out the best exit.
Hivemind are coming to the Hen and Chickens Theatre this Summer with a cracker of an innovative show. Three directors try to win over the audience with improvised stories acted out by the rest of the Hivemind cast on the spur of the moment. As each scene ends you decide whether to “stick” and see where the story goes or “twist” and let the next director take over. The director who ends up with the least scenes acted out has to pay a ‘terrible forfeit’. Told you it was harsh.
We have been wondering whether or not to share this secret gem with you for a while now. Having walked past Cazenove Road on many a drunken occasion, we’d spotted The Lacy Nook A Board luring us inwards with a siren’s call of cocktails and beer garden. But unfortunately we’d get the timing all wrong and they’d rarely be open. “Closed at 4am! How ludicrous?” we’d holler, slurring and swaying up the road. Until now. Opening last year, The Lacy Nook is a collaboration between two friends who turned to Kickstarter to help them achieve this culinary dream . Think small and large plates of fusion Balkan BBQ, salads and carpaccio alongside
This year, Playing Up have commissioned a new play by Sophie Ellerby (HighTide First Commissions Writer and NYT REP Company 2013), Three, which will be staged at the Arcola Theatre from 20th to 22nd July. The urban and domestic drama, directed by NYT Associate Director Anna Niland follows three sisters who fight to keep track of reality as their world is turned upside down.
Tonight, on this dull yet sweaty Monday, what you may well need is to show your confectionary based fillings to the ceiling and let it all out with a huge bellowing guffaw about nothing in particular. Let the likes of quick witted Josie Long, surreal twosome Max and Ivan and the downright uproarious Tom Parry help you escape the chocolate lacking reality of 2017.
Registered charity, All Dogs Matter are a dog rehoming centre based in Archway. They use a mixture of foster homes and kennel spaces to house their dogs, who are each looking to be fostered or adopted. Occasionally we look through their profiles of beautiful singletons looking for love and feature one at random. We interviewed one newly single lady in particular called Lottie. A fun spirited character with smooth hair and a huge grin, Lottie was a right laugh.
Next Sunday it’s the Cally Road Jumble Trail, run by the community. Think a car boot sale but on the street with vintage clothing, accessories, toys, original creations and cakes if you’re lucky. The whole of the trail is set up online over at jumbletrail.com where visitors get a colour coded map to explore and discover all the hidden treasures on offer from your neighbourhood.
You’ve got your socks pulled up but no Cliff Richard in sight. You’re all white shorted up with nowhere to go. It’s time to find out where your white headbanded self will fit in. Here's our top four Wimbledon screening hang outs to try this Summer.
Until five minutes ago I would’ve believed Pet Nat was a holistic dog food brand / veterinary business in Wood Green. I’m half right actually*, but in the boozios world it’s a fizzy wine. Pétillant Naturel is light and fizzy, usually pretty low on the alcohol scale and rather sweet. Think the opposite of a dry red wine.
Abney Public Hall is hosting a market of world food delicacies next weekend, having gathered together the creme de la creme of planet Earth’s cuisine. Prepare for a mass fusion of cultures, great food, drink and music just off Stoke Newington Church Street.
Otherwise known as the shoredification of London, there are four stages of denial when it comes to dealing with the inevitability of gentrification. Are you a dilapidated ol’ boozer clinging on to the same threads since 1989, or more of a craft beer-swilling/moustache-bearing pop up type propping up the bar at a cookie dough cafe? Let’s find out before your bedroom’s transformed in to a pop up belfie gallery.
Poop poop! Get your driving gloves on and tweed jackets ready, for Toady has invited us down to Toad Hall for a banquet on the riverbank. Join The Literary Hour for their all new immersive supper club experience this Summer. It’s the eighth in their series of book themed events with multi-sensory five course meals featuring additional surprises… Ooh ratty!
Every last Thursday of the month a motley crew of performing acts shuffle off to the skinny little Moustache Bar on Stoke Newington Road for a night of microphone hogging. It’s Open Mic night and the stage isn’t just available to acoustic guitar yielding crooners. The floor is open for all you comedians, rappers, poets, hell even actors are welcome to come tread the boards at Moustache Bar this Thursday 27th July.
Ah Stokey. You chilled out little rebel of North London. The seemingly easy breezy, laissez-faire attitude that appears to exude from every award winning eatery and baby clothes shop of Church Street is all but an organic hessian veil over it’s anarchic and rebellious history. Nonconformists, anti fascists and dissenters built the area as we know it.
Trying our luck, we decided to ask the wonderful Raina and Saira of Joginder Supper Club to give us some unseen insight in to their centuries old Punjabi recipes. Amazingly they agreed to shed some light on one of their most tasty dishes: the Bhoolghobi Tamatar (cauliflower with tomato and potato). Over to the experts...
So this July 198 cyclists head over to Germany to start the Tour de France. If you think that is weird, wait till I tell you it started in Yorkshire a few years ago. Anyway after the three days of the Grand Depart the spectacle of the world's biggest sporting event heads back to France and the action really begins.
Did you take one look at the ticket prices for Glastonbury, vomit in your mouth and close your laptop slowly? Did you get a debilitating case of FOMO scrolling through your friends Glastonbury pics and “oops lost my phone at Radiohead” status updates? Or did you actually go to Glastonbury, witness Jon Snow drop the f bomb and now know that life will never get any better