Top 4 'Give-It-To-Me-Now-I-Can-Take-It' Espressos

Written by: Violet Myers

It’s been said that Mr Gordon Ramsay (Michelin star chef, general angry man) judges each eatery he visits by the strength of their Bloody Mary.

Well, we busy people at North Four don’t touch the devil’s broth…not with a hangover like this anyway. We like our drinks small and bitter – think Tom Cruise during Oscar season. We want ‘em hot, quick and served in a tiny mug.

We’ll be judging 4 of the best in the N4 area, taking into account flavour, resulting perkiness and a certain je ne sais qoui that we can’t quite put our finger on…

 

Boulangerie Bon Matin.

First impression: darker than the clams of the sea, but a little on the thin side.

Add some sugar: leave it out.

If it were a Londoner it would be: Joanna Lumley; classic and a little bit posh.

Sex appeal: good body and not at all bitter, friends with benefits.

Resulting Perkiness: probably won’t run home, but certainly fixed the mid afternoon slump.

 

Vagabond.

First impression: darker than your ex’s heart with none of the hurt feelings

Add some sugar: don’t you dare!

If it were a Londoner it would be: Roots Manuva, cool and edgy

Sex Appeal: Raunchy, a full on affair; keep the house and the kids!

Resulting Perkiness: Ready to punch the day in the face!

 

The Deli at 80.

First impression: darker than BP’s ocean floor, but with less dead flounder.

Add some sugar: yeah, this little rascal needs a little sweetness.

If it were a Londoner it would be: Amy Winehouse; A bit in your face, but easy to forgive.

Sex Appeal: a quick fumble behind the bike sheds.

Resulting Perkiness: Scar Face has nothing on me!

 

Exeter Street Bakery.

First impression: darker than a Frankie Boyle joke at a funeral

Add some sugar: no ta, Barbara.

If it were a Londoner it would be: Charlie Chaplin; short, rich and familiar.

Sex Appeal: saucy, drunken skinny dipping in the Med.

Resulting Perkiness: can anyone else hear that ringing?

 

Best of the rest (because, let’s face it, N4 is full of awesome coffee)…

Blighty Coffee – Blackstock Road
The Front Room Cafe – Tollington Park Road
Finsbury Park Theatre Cafe – Clifton Terrace

 

Photos: Michael Barry (top and header images) / Rebecca Scott (bottom image)

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